The Colorado State police just issued a warrant...
PostPosted:Sat Feb 19, 2011 1:54 pm
...for the arrest of Blues GM Doug Armstrong for robbing the Avalanche of their future. Early this morning, Doug Armstrong tip-toed into the homes of Chris Stewart and Kevin Shattenkirk and drugged both men and replaced them with Blues 1st round draft choice in 2008 Eric Johnson and Jay McClement alledgedly. When the Av's head trainer called both residences he thought maybe both players were sick since they had overslept and hadn't arrived at the morning skate. "Honestly, I thought they both just had colds. It wasn't until I arrived at their homes that I knew something was amiss." He goes on to say, "Chris at first looked like he had packed on at least 20 lbs and a couple inches in height, but I thought he just had his pads and skates on. Sometimes he's been known to sleep in his equipment. But then I saw blonde hair." The Av's trainer immediately called Boulder police to report the theft.
In a daring robbery at Pepsi Centre also last night, a large man with a receeding hair line and puffy mustache and two others, both described as vertically challenged, stole a 2nd round draft pick from the Avs. Officials aren't commenting on which year the draft pick was for but noted that the smaller, balder of the three assailents dropped a 1st round draft pick while fleeing the scene. "All we heard was someone screaming 'Thank you thank you thank you' and then a large pang and a car speeding off into the night." guards stated. A large Blue mascot was apprehended attempting to catch a flight to Saint Louis this morning and is being held for questioning. So far investigators will not say if he is talking or not. Investigators are still not sure if both crimes are connected but suspect that the Mascot has ties to an organization in Missouri.
The mayor of Denver stated that, "...this is a henious crime..." and that "..the police will work every angle to make sure who ever is responsible is brought to justice."
12 hours earlier, a similar crime took place in Tampa during broad day light. Tampa Bay police could not be reached for comment before this story went to press.
In a daring robbery at Pepsi Centre also last night, a large man with a receeding hair line and puffy mustache and two others, both described as vertically challenged, stole a 2nd round draft pick from the Avs. Officials aren't commenting on which year the draft pick was for but noted that the smaller, balder of the three assailents dropped a 1st round draft pick while fleeing the scene. "All we heard was someone screaming 'Thank you thank you thank you' and then a large pang and a car speeding off into the night." guards stated. A large Blue mascot was apprehended attempting to catch a flight to Saint Louis this morning and is being held for questioning. So far investigators will not say if he is talking or not. Investigators are still not sure if both crimes are connected but suspect that the Mascot has ties to an organization in Missouri.
The mayor of Denver stated that, "...this is a henious crime..." and that "..the police will work every angle to make sure who ever is responsible is brought to justice."
12 hours earlier, a similar crime took place in Tampa during broad day light. Tampa Bay police could not be reached for comment before this story went to press.