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  • Saint Seiya - manga that makes the least sense

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Your favorite band sucks, and you have terrible taste in movies.
 #154089  by Don
 Fri Sep 09, 2011 1:58 pm
Saint Seiya: Lost Canvas Gaiden is still going for a while, and it's still doing pretty well. However, although Lost Canvas is clearly an attempt to remake Saint Seiya if anything in it actually make sense, I don't think it's actually better than the original Saint Seiya because Saint Seiya is hilariously nonsensical at times, it's almost comedy in itself, and somehow all the nonsensical stuff never actually detracted the main story, so you can compile all the ways Saint Seiya defies reality (even fictional reality) and still enjoy the material.

1. Saori is supposed to be 13 years old and look like this:
Image

I can't think of any manga where a 13 year old looks like this. She must be the product of human growth hormone, or something.

2. Saori's grandfather needed to sacrifice something like 80 kids to serve the goddess Athena (Saori) after he adopted her. It's pretty clear all his 80 kids can't be more than about an year apart in age, and they come from pretty much every place on Earth. I don't think Wilt Chamberlain can pull that off, and he's supposed to be dying old man. This part was actually dropped in the Anime probably because this goes well beyond what is possible even in fiction.

3. In the flashback, Shun was just born when Phoenix Ikki was old enough to walk, talk in complete sentences, and carry his baby brother around. Let's say he's 4 at this point (I'd say more like 6). By #2, Phoenix Ikki cannot be more than 12 years old, so that means Shun can be at most 8 years old, but he has a hot girlfriend wearing leather and a whip, and his own fangirl club.

4. Phoenix Ikki never hides the fact that he is, true to his name, the Phoenix and utterly immortal. Yet none of his enemies ever questioned how they were supposed to defeat a being where death only makes him stronger.

5. Phoenix Ikki said he was the man who escaped from Saga's Alternate Dimension, except Saga never used that move on him (probably a good idea, since nobody would be surprised if Phoenix Ikki escaped from a black hole let alone just another dimension).

6. Saori speculated that the Pope might be one of the 12 Gold Saints. It has been decreed by Athena (which is herself) since the beginning of the time that the Pope is chosen from the 12 Gold Saints.

7. Moving at light speed is considered a basic requirement to become a Gold Saint. As mentioned before, the Pope is chosen from the strongest of the Gold Saints. Yet when Aiolia attempted to attack the Pope, he was totally surprised that the Pope indeed could move at the speed of light.

8. Seiya long suspected that Marin, his mentor, was actually his older sister. They were separated when Seiya was sent on a plane to Sanctuary, and as far as we know Seiya has been under Marin's tutelege as soon as he got to Sanctuary. So his sister clearly took a jet to get to Sanctuary first, mastered an ancient art of fighting in about a day, passed the silver saint test, got appointed to train the new guy who just arrived, put on a mask, and it never occurred to her that she could tell her brother that she's here all along.

Seiya also tried to take off Marin's mask. It's a tradition established since begining of time that if a female Saint is demasked, she'd either have to kill or marry the one who took off her mask, and Seiya knew these rules and thought Marin was his sister.

8a. Despite the most logical thing would suggest there was no way Marin could've been Seiya's sister, it turns out that she was not his sister after all and Occam's Razor is actually observed.

9. Shun's chains, depending on which translation you believe, has a seek range of several to several million LIGHTYEARS. He will say this and then immediately use his chains on someone who is clearly within melee range to demonstrate just how far these chains will go. Note that the fights in Saint Seiya never leaves the planet Earth, so it's not like he needed that kind of range.

10. Shaka says his eyes can see the true nature of everything in the world, and in his eyes The Pope (Saga) is pure good, even though Saga is actually evil incarnate and doesn't even do a good job hiding it. Perhaps the point here is that don't trust anything about vision from a man who was effectively blind.

11. Excalibur is apparently no match against a giant axe.

12. It takes Absolute Zero (as in -273.15C) to freeze a Gold Saint, but Hyuga managed to do this before he learned Absolute Zero. This isn't even a retcon because Hyuga learned how to use Absolute Zero about 3 chapters later when he realize his cold attacks can't defeat a Gold Saint, except the guy he just defeated earlier.

13. Although Saints can recreate the events that led to the Big Bang (as in the creation of the Universe), there are apparently a lot of objects on Earth that can withstand the Big Bang.