The Shrine

Seriously. it makes no effort at story or chacacterization. But it's balls out fucking awesome fun. go expecting a dumb action movie and you will giggle the qhole way through and squeel with delight as everything you ever did with your action figures as a kid is brought to life on screen. And I do mean everything. I'm amazed a sub didn't crash up through a bathtub at some point. It's just fucking retarded awesome. and for that I loved it. Unlike Transformers it works because it makes no effort to be anything but what it is. an action figure movie filled with over the top insane ridiculous levels of crazy fucking awesome action

I just watched an incredibly dumb action flick; though I suspected it would be. I watched it to clear my head of the mind fuckery that came about after watching Silence of the Lambs (you know that disturbed feeling that comes about after watching certain movies; Taxi Driver is another).

Jumper - no story, dumb ass characters. Literally what occurs in the movie seems like what should happen in an extended sequence of intros. You don't find out anything about the characters; nothing is resolved; and you are wondering as much as Samuel L Jackson how someone so stupid managed to survive for 8 years =P

Tupac Seekur wrote:I just watched an incredibly dumb action flick; though I suspected it would be. I watched it to clear my head of the mind fuckery that came about after watching Silence of the Lambs (you know that disturbed feeling that comes about after watching certain movies; Taxi Driver is another).

Jumper - no story, dumb ass characters. Literally what occurs in the movie seems like what should happen in an extended sequence of intros. You don't find out anything about the characters; nothing is resolved; and you are wondering as much as Samuel L Jackson how someone so stupid managed to survive for 8 years =P

you should have gone to see Joe. because unlike Jumper.....Joe is made of both stupid and pure fucking awesome. It's terribly brilliant. Fucking hell it's badass though. Powersuits.....lame looking but I'll be damned if that ain't one of the most badass awesome chase scenes I've seen in a long time. Holy geez it's made of awesome and win and retarded. But the thing is....it knows what it is. It's not like Van Helsing which would have been great if they had stopped repeatedly trying to have a scene thrown in that tries to mean something. GI Joe is mindless, it's dumb and it knows it is. And fr that it fucking shines.

How does one write a serious GI Joe movie? When it comes down to it, GI Joe was a dumb cartoon.

SineSwiper wrote:How does one write a serious GI Joe movie? When it comes down to it, GI Joe was a dumb cartoon.

that's what I love about it. THe only time it's ever been serious is sometimes in the comics but for the most part it's retarded stupid fun and the movie....it's retarded stupid fun

SineSwiper wrote:How does one write a serious GI Joe movie? When it comes down to it, GI Joe was a dumb cartoon.

You guys never listen, do you? You use the cartoon as a base and - WHILE GIVING A SHIT ABOUT THE SOURCE MATERIAL - you update and change it as necessary. There's nothing to say it can't have great action, great characters, and still have a strong, cohesive storyline. You don't have to sacrifice one for the other but that seems to be the mentality.

Unfortunately, Hollywood has a history of ignoring the capitalized stuff. That's why it's so nice to have so many nerds become big-shot directors and having Marvel become its own independent studio. You still have a lot of the old, rape-this-to-our-formula movies, but it's changing....slowly.

Zeus wrote:

SineSwiper wrote:How does one write a serious GI Joe movie? When it comes down to it, GI Joe was a dumb cartoon.

You guys never listen, do you? You use the cartoon as a base and - WHILE GIVING A SHIT ABOUT THE SOURCE MATERIAL - you update and change it as necessary. There's nothing to say it can't have great action, great characters, and still have a strong, cohesive storyline. You don't have to sacrifice one for the other but that seems to be the mentality.

Unfortunately, Hollywood has a history of ignoring the capitalized stuff. That's why it's so nice to have so many nerds become big-shot directors and having Marvel become its own independent studio. You still have a lot of the old, rape-this-to-our-formula movies, but it's changing....slowly.

You never really answered my question.

SineSwiper wrote:

Zeus wrote:

SineSwiper wrote:How does one write a serious GI Joe movie? When it comes down to it, GI Joe was a dumb cartoon.

You guys never listen, do you? You use the cartoon as a base and - WHILE GIVING A SHIT ABOUT THE SOURCE MATERIAL - you update and change it as necessary. There's nothing to say it can't have great action, great characters, and still have a strong, cohesive storyline. You don't have to sacrifice one for the other but that seems to be the mentality.

Unfortunately, Hollywood has a history of ignoring the capitalized stuff. That's why it's so nice to have so many nerds become big-shot directors and having Marvel become its own independent studio. You still have a lot of the old, rape-this-to-our-formula movies, but it's changing....slowly.

You never really answered my question.

Exactly as I said: update and change as necessary while giving a shit about the source material. You want to make GI Joe into a serious action flick? Think of what elements you can take from the TV show (such as the setting of an elite anti-terrorism military unit or a good chunk of the characters from both the Joes and Cobra - although you would have to change a number of them), what the spirit behind the TV show is (Joes using high-end technology to stop the equally technologically-adept Cobra bent on world domination) and update it without making it stupid/silly/against the spirit of the show (ie the silly power suits).

There is absolutely no reason to ever sacrifice any of those three points when adapting material and the really good movies usually don't (there are exceptions to every rule; I'm talking in general).

see that's the thing. this one does give a shit about the source material.....in that....THEY ARE FUCKING TOYS YOU SMASH AROUND IN VEHICLES. it's a toy movie. it's proud of the fact it's a toy movie. and it works as a more modern orgin for cobra. At least better than the commander just being a narcissistic used car salesman with a penchant for anarchy. It's flat out stupid just as the cartoon was. it's just not the cartoon. it's not the cartoon and it's not the comics. It's a toy line. and it's plainly obvious that the people that made the movie knew that and wanted to have as much fun with that as they could by re-enacting everything they ever did as a kid with the toys. The acting is wooden, the characterization plastic, and by god the action is like a kid in a sandbox with handfulls of GI-Joes. It's completely self aware. In ffact if they zoomed the camera out a little bit I'd bet you would find an image of an omnipotent adolescent god-being playing with toys in his backyard

Do they ever say "And now you know."

"And knowing is half the battle!"

Because if they don't I can't endorse this movie.

RentCavalier wrote:Do they ever say "And now you know."

"And knowing is half the battle!"

Because if they don't I can't endorse this movie.

Yeah, I've been saying that since I heard about the movie. If they ended it with a PSA just like the original series, I wouldn't care how bad the movie is.